Sometimes, when things change, I can be all ZOMGoodness!, I’M DYING!
Right.
Anyhoo.
This pretty much carries over into every aspect of my life. I can’t figure out if I am dramatic because it adds a certain degree of spiciness to life, or if I am somehow hardwired to catastrophize every situation.
I will let you know once I figure this trash out.
Back to the subject at hand.
I shared the other day that we are adopting (Or rather, opening ourselves up to adoption, and the timing will be left up to the Lord).
Anyway.
As time creeps onward, my dramatic self rears its head.
My mind starts to go crazy:
“What if I never get another moment alone to myself?”
“What if I can’t ever go out to eat again?”
“What if I can’t ever buy myself something again?”
So…I have been justifying doing crazy actions (Does this surprise you? It should not.)
For example:
I bought an entire bag of Cadbury mini easter eggs and ate them by myself over the course of two days. Why? I figured I would never be able to eat something alone ever again. So, classically, I went overboard and ate them all. This makes sense to a rational person, I am sure.
I bought myself two new pairs of pants. Why? I just knew I could never buy myself clothes again because I would buy all the clothes for the kids (This also is rational. Clearly.)
I stayed up until 2:00am. Why? I knew I would have to go to bed early with the kids, so my rebellious self rose up inside me and told me stay up. Did I regret this decision? Yes. I was a zombie the next day at work. And a grouch, too.
Now, while I recognize that I will have to do some cut-backs on my spending, it is not as melodramatic as my crazy brain convinces me it will be.
However, apparently, my husband has caught the same “Oh-my-gosh-we’re-going-to-be-parents-soon” bug too, because he just came home with matching iPhones for us. He said it was necessary as we wouldn’t be able to make any more big purchases after this time.
So somehow I am going to have to reign both of us in. But until I figure out how to do that, I will be here. With my Cadbury eggs. Hoarding them to myself. While calling someone on my new iPhone.
