I.R.N.B. Movement

Anyone who knows me well can tell you that I love pop culture.

I have no idea what my weird obsession is with celebrities and their lives, as well as the music which I mostly find totally meaningless, yet delightfully entertaining!

However, despite my love for pop culture, there are certain aspects about it that I just, for the life of me, can.not.understand.

For example, I’m listening to the radio the other day and Usher comes on. Now, I still remember back when Usher actually made semi-good love songs. Nowadays? Not so much.

Exhibit A:

I’m driving down the road, enjoying the nice summer day. For the most part, the lyrics on the radio are just floating past my ears, and not into my head.

But then the chorus comes on. All of a sudden, I tune in and these lyrics start to enter into my brain. And I find myself being serenaded by the most amazing and deep lyrics ever (read: the most disturbing lyrics I’ve ever allowed to enter my brain).

And I bet you’re wondering what this wonderfully deep and amazing chorus said, aren’t you?

Well, lucky for you, you don’t have to wonder. I (being so special and amazing myself) will share them with you now:

“You say Daddy's home, home for me
And I know you've been waiting for this loving all day
You know your daddy's home (daddy's home),
and it's time to play (so it's time to play)
So you ain't got to give my loving away
So all my ladies say hey hey .hey daddy
Hey hey .hey daddy
So all my ladies say hey hey .hey daddy
Hey hey .hey daddy”

UMMMMMM, can we say creepy?

I literally have been perplexed by this urban movement to call your significant other by the name ‘daddy’ for as long as it’s been a trend.

What happened to just calling someone ‘sweetheart’, ‘baby’, ‘lover’ even!!!??!! I mean, is that still an option?

But daddy?

Seriously?

I mean, if I picture calling my husband ‘daddy’?? I want to barf. 12 times. Maybe even more. Ugh. I am shuddering even thinking of it.

The only time I want to call my husband ‘daddy’ is when we have children and he is actually a daddy.

Otherwise? Sexually? That is the LAST thing I want to think about.

So therefore, if you are with me that this movement is extraordinarily creepy, then I think we should start our own movement. It will be called the “I-will-never-call-my-husband-‘daddy’” movement. But, that could be shortened easily to the “I’d-rather-not-barf” movement, or I.R.N.B.

Come on, people. I need support.

I’m sick of hearing about people ‘playing’ with their daddies in their bedrooms.

That is soooo wrong on soooo many levels.

Barf.